Contents: The DoD Rules by consensus The DoD Logo by Chuck Rogers DoD #3 DoD "Road Rider" article by Bruce Tanner DoD #161 DoD: The Saga Unfolds by John Sloan DoD #11 The DoD (this started it all) by The Denizen of Doom DoD #1 The DoD Anthem by Jonathan Quist DoD #94 The DoD man page by Alan Fleming DoD #4210 Why you have to be killed by Blaine Gardner DoD #46 Patches? What patches? by Blaine Gardner DoD #46 Letter from the AMA museum by Jim Rogers, Director AMHF DoD #395 The rec.moto.photo.archive courtesy of Bruce Tanner DoD #161 Other rec.moto resources by various Keepers DoD #misc The rec.moto.reviews.archive courtesy of Loki Jorgenson DoD #1210 Winona ftp site courtesy of John Stafford DoD #1956 Updated stats & rides info by Jon Steiger DoD #1038 How do I get a DoD number? by Jon Steiger DoD #1038 How can I placate the KotL? by Charlie Smith DoD #709
The Rules, Regulations, & Bylaws of the Denizens of Doom Motorcycle Club
From time to time there is some mention, discussion, or flame about the rules of the DoD. In order to fan the flames, here is the complete text of the rules governing the DoD.
Rule #1: There are no rules. Rule #0: Go ride.There is a group of motorcyclists that gets together and does all the normal things that a bunch of bikers do. They discuss motorcycles and motorcycling, beverages, cleaning fluids, baklavah, balaclava, caltrops, helmets, anti-fog shields, spine protectors, aerodynamics, three-angle valve seats, bird hits, deer whistles, good restaurants, racing philosophy, traffic laws, tickets, corrosion control, personalities, puns, double entendres, culture, absence of culture, first rides and friendship. They argue with each other and plan rides together.
The DoD daemon as seen on the patches, pins, etc. Created by Chuck Rogers, email@example.com, DoD #0003 :-( DoD )-: :-( x __ __ x )-: :-( x / / \ \ x )-: :-( x / / -\-----/- \ \ x )-: :-( L | \/ \ / \/ | F )-: :-( I | / \ / \ | L )-: :-( V \/ __ / __ \/ A )-: :-( E / / \ / \ \ M )-: :-( | | \ / | | E )-: :-( T | | . | _ | . | | )-: :-( O | \___// \\___/ | T )-: :-( \ \_/ / O )-: :-( F \___ ___/ )-: :-( L \ \ / / L )-: :-( A \ vvvvv / I )-: :-( M | ( ) | V )-: :-( E | ^^^^^ | E )-: :-( x \_______/ x )-: :-( x x )-: :-( x rec.motorcycles x )-: :-( USENET )-:
"Denizens of Doom", by Bruce Tanner (DoD 0161) [Road Rider, August 1991, reprinted with Bruce's permission]
The difference between this group and your local motorcycle club is that, although they get together just about everyday, most have never seen each other face to face. The members of this group live all over the known world and communicate with each other electronically via computer.
The computers range from laptops to multi-million dollar computer centers; the people range from college and university students to high-tech industry professionals to public-access electronic bulletin-board users. Currently, rec.motorcycles (pronounced "wreck-dot-motorcycles," it's the file name for the group's primary on-line "meeting place") carries about 2250 articles per month; it is read by an estimated 29,000 people. Most of the frequent posters belong to a motorcycle club, the Denizens of Doom, usually referred to as the DoD.
The DoD started when motorcyclist John R. Nickerson wrote a couple of parodies designed to poke fun at motorcycle stereotypes. Fellow computer enthusiast Bruce Robinson posted these articles under the pen name, "Denizen of Doom." A while later Chuck Rogers signed off as DoD number 0003 Keeper of the Flame. Bruce was then designated DoD number 0002, retroactively and, of course, Nickerson, the originator of the parodies, was given DoD number 0001.
The idea of a motorcycle club with no organization, no meetings and no rules appealed to many, so John Sloan -- DoD number 0011 -- became Keeper of the List, issuing DoD numbers to anyone who wanted one. To date there have been almost 400 memberships issued to people all over the United States and Canada, as well as Australia, New Zealand, the United Kingdom, France, Germany, Norway and Finland.
Keeper of the List Sloan eventually designed a club patch. The initial run of 300 patches sold out immediately. The profits from this went to the American Motorcycle Heritage Foundation. Another AMHF fund raiser -- selling Denizens of Doom pins to members -- was started by Arnie Skurow a few months later. Again, the project was successful and the profits were donated to the foundation. So far, the Denizens have contributed over $1500 to the AMA museum. A plaque in the name of the Denizens of Doom now hangs in the Motorcycle Heritage Museum.
As often as possible, the DoD'ers crawl out from behind their CRTs and go riding together. It turns out that the two largest concentrations of DoD'ers are centered near Denver/Boulder, Colorado, and in California's "Silicon Valley." Consequently, two major events are the annual Assault on Rollins Pass in Colorado, and the Northern versus Southern California "Joust."
The Ride-and-Feed is a bike trip over Rollins Pass, followed by a big barbecue dinner. The concept for the Joust is to have riders from Northern California ride south; riders from Southern California to ride north, meeting at a predesignated site somewhere in the middle. An additional plan for 1991 is to hold an official Denizens of Doom homecoming in conjunction with the AMA heritage homecoming in Columbus, Ohio, in July.
Though it's a safe bet the the Denizens of Doom and their collective communications hub, rec.motorcycles, will not replace the more traditional motorcycle organizations, for those who prowl the electronic pathways in search of two-wheeled camaraderie, it's a great way for kindred spirits to get together. Long may they flame.
"Live to Flame -- Flame to Live" [centerbar]This official motto of the Denizens of Doom refers to the ease with which you can gratuitously insult someone electronically, when you would not do anything like that face to face. These insults are known as "flames"; issuing them is called "flaming." Flames often start when a member disagrees with something another member has posted over the network. A typical, sophisticated, intelligent form of calm, reasoned rebuttal would be something like: "What an incredibly stupid statement, you Spandex-clad poseur!" This will guarantee that five other people will reply in defense of the original poster, describing just what they think of you, your riding ability and your cat.
_The Denizens of Doom: The Saga Unfolds_ by John Sloan DoD #0011
Periodically the question "What is DoD?" is raised. This is one of those questions in the same class as "Why is the sky blue?", "If there is a God, why is there so much suffering in the world?" and "Why do women inevitably tell you that you're such a nice guy just before they dump you?", the kinds of questions steeped in mysticism, tradition, and philosophy, questions that have inspired research and discussion by philosophers in locker rooms, motorcycle service bays, and in the halls of academe for generations.
A long, long time ago (in computer time, where anything over a few minutes is an eternity and the halting problem really is a problem) on a computer far, far away on the net (topologically speaking; two machines in the same room in Atlanta might route mail to one another via a system in Chicago), a chap who wished to remain anonymous (but who was eventually assigned the DoD membership #1) wrote a satire of the various personalities and flame wars of rec.motorcycles, and signed it "The Denizen of Doom". Not wishing to identify himself, he asked that stalwart individual who would in the fullness of time become DoD #2 to post it for him. DoD #2, not really giving a whit about what other people thought and generally being a right thinking individual, did so. Flaming and other amusements followed.
He who would become the holder of DoD membership #3 thought this was the funniest thing he'd seen in a while (being the sort that is pretty easily amused), so he claimed membership in the Denizens of Doom Motorcycle Club, and started signing his postings with his membership number.
Perhaps readers of rec.motorcycles were struck with the vision of a motorcycle club with no dues, no rules, no restrictions as to brand or make or model or national origin of motorcycle, a club organized electronically. It may well be that readers were yearning to become a part of something that would provide them with a greater identity, a gestalt personality, something in which the whole was greater than the sum of its parts. It could also be that we're all computer nerds who wear black socks and sneakers and pocket protectors, who just happen to also love taking risks on machines with awesome power to weight ratios, social outcasts who saw a clique that would finally be open minded enough to accept us as members.
In a clear case of self fulfilling prophesy, The Denizens of Doom Motorcycle Club was born. A club in which the majority of members have never met one another face to face (and perhaps like it that way), yet feel that they know one another pretty well (or well enough given some of the electronic personalities in the newsgroup). A club organized and run (in the loosest sense of the word) by volunteers through the network via electronic news and mail, with a membership/mailing list (often used to organize group rides amongst members who live in the same region), a motto, a logo, a series of photo albums circulating around the country (organized by DoD #9), club patches (organized by #11), and even an MTV-style music video (produced by #47 and distributed on VHS by #18)!
Where will it end? Who knows? Will the DoD start sanctioning races, placing limits on the memory and clock rate of the on-board engine management computers? Will the DoD organize poker runs where each participant collects a hand of hardware and software reference cards? Will the DoD have a rally in which the attendees demand a terminal room and at least a 386-sized UNIX system? Only time will tell.
The DoD has no dues, no rules, and no requirements other than net access and a love for motorcycles. To become a member, one need only ask (although we will admit that who you must ask is one of the few really good club secrets). New members will receive via email a membership number and the latest copy of the membership list, which includes name, state, and email address.
The Denizens of Doom Motorcycle Club will live forever (or at least until next year when we may decide to change the name).
Live to Flame - Flame to Live
The DoD by the Denizen of Doom DoD #1
Welcome one and all to the flamingest, most wonderfullest newsgroup of all time: wreck.mudder-disciples or is it reak.mudder-disciples? The Names have been changes to protect the Guilty (riders) and Innocent (the bikes) alike. If you think you recognize a contorted version of your name, you don't. It's just your guilt complex working against you. Read 'em and weep.
We tune in on a conversation between some of our heros. Terrible Barbarian is extolling the virtues of his Hopalonga Puff-a-cane to Reverend Muck Mudgers and Stompin Fueling-Injection:Terrible: This Hopalonga is the greatest... Beats BMWs dead!!
Script for the Denizens of Doom Anthem Video by Jonathan E. Quist DoD #94
[Scene: A sterile engineering office. A lone figure, whom we'll call Chuck, stands by a printer output bin, wearing a white CDC lab coat, with 5 mechanical pencils in a pocket protector.]
(editor's note: For some reason a great deal of amusement was had at the First Annual DoD Uni-Coastal Ironhorse Ride & Joust by denizens referring to each other as "Chuck". I guess you had to be there. I wasn't.)
Chuck: I didn't want to be a Software Systems Analyst,
cow-towing to the whims of a machine, and saying yessir, nosir,
may-I-have-another-sir. My mother made me do it. I wanted
to live a man's life,
[Music slowly builds in background]
riding Nortons and Triumphs through the highest mountain passes and the deepest valleys,
living the life of a Motorcyclist;
doing donuts and evading the police;
terrorizing old ladies and raping small children;
eating small dogs for tea (and large dogs for dinner). In short,
[Chuck rips off his lab coat, revealing black leather jacket (with fringe), boots, and cap. Scene simultaneously changes to the top of an obviously assaulted Rollins Pass. A small throng of Hell's Angels sit on their Harleys in the near background, gunning their engines, showering lookers-on with nails as they turn donuts, and leaking oil on the tarmac. Chuck is standing in front of a heavily chromed Fat Boy.]
Chuck [Sings to the tune of "The Lumberjack Song"]:I'm a Denizen and I'm okay,
The DoD man page From: firstname.lastname@example.org (Alan Fleming) Newsgroups: rec.motorcycles Subject: Re: Looking for comments on the late [FAQ - What is the DoD?] Keywords: It's a joke, son. A Joke. Date: 10 Nov 92 22:21:17 GMT You mean you can't just do a "man" on it? tridom> man dod DOD(8C) MAINTENANCE COMMANDS DOD(8C) NAME dod - DoD services daemon SYNOPSIS /bin/dod [ options ] DESCRIPTION dod, the DoD services daemon, is normally invoked to to answer a question on the usenet newsgroup rec.motorcycles. The environment variable DODNUMBER will effect the defaults of the program. If DODNUMBER is null, then the defaults listed below as [default] are used. The results of a non-null DODNUMBER are also noted below. The daemon will ignore all options, if the environment variable ORGANIZATION contains the string ".edu". example% dod Options to make things more interesting are as follows: ? Ask "What is the DOD?" The dod daemon normally responds by spawning a flame(1). [default] -F Ask for the "DOD FAQ" The dod daemon responds by either mailing the FAQ, spawning a flame(1) or sending a wait(1) signal. -K Ask for status of "KOTL(8C)" The dod daemon responds by spawning either a flame(1) or sending the error message "See DOD FAQ" See -F option. -L Request status of llama process. -ED Send "Ed Get A Bike" message to DoD daemon. Message is usually respawns itself rand(1) times. Messages are ignored by Ed. -CS Send Countersteering message to DoD daemon. If DODNUMBER is 0111, the DoD daemon will respond with "Ed Get A Bike" message. See -ED option. DoD daemon may respond with msf(1) command or a random, meaningless bit stream from /dev/physics. -FJ [n] Send status message about FJ being top priority bike. DoD daemon normally responds with similar Harley status message and BMW status message. DoD daemon may begin to rapidly spawn flame(1) commands and crash. FJ status message can be repeated n times. -BMW [n] Send status message about BMW being top priority bike. DoD daemon normally responds with similar Harley status message and FJ status message. DoD daemon may begin to rapidly spawn flame(1) commands and crash. BMW status message can be repeated n times. -HD [n] Send status message about Harley being top priority bike. DoD daemon normally responds with similar FJ status message and BMW status message. DoD daemon may begin to rapidly spawn flame(1) commands and crash. HD status message can be repeated n times. ENVIRONMENT DODNUMBER is a current DoD number. If the environment variable DODNUMBER is set to DoD number other than that owned by the invoker, the dod daemon will crash. This is often caused by a flame(1) command being spawned out of control. ORGANIZATION is the invoker's organization. If the string ".edu" is included in the ORGANIZATION environment variable, all options are ignored and the DoD daemon responds by spawning flame(1) commands. FILES cerritos:/dod/demon1.ps PostScript picture of DoD daemon. cerritos:/dod/dod.list List of dod members. cerritos:/dod/*.gif Digitized pictures of dod'ers. cerritos:/dod/dod_faq.txt Answers to all dod questions. BUGS Any message sent to the DoD daemon may cause it to spawn flame(1) commands and crash. Apparently, some valuable status messages are either being redirected to /dev/null, or are being encrypted to appear as request for a flame(1). This problem is being examined. MAN AUTHOR Alan Fleming - DoD 4210 HISTORY Program written soon after the invent of rec.motorcycles. SEE ALSO flame(1), kotl(8C), msf(1), wait(1) Printed 11/10/92 11/10/92 1
Why you have to be killed.
Well, the first thing you have to understand (just in case you managed to read this far, and still not figure it out) is that the DoD started as a joke. And in the words of one Denizen, it intends to remain one.
Sometime in the far distant past, a hapless newbie asked: "What does DoD stand for? It's not the Department of Defense is it?" Naturally, a Denizen who had watched the movie "Top Gun" a few times too many rose to the occasion and replied:
"That's classified, we could tell you, but then we'd have to kill you."
And the rest is history.
A variation on the "security" theme is to supply disinformation about what DoD means. Notable contributions (and contributers, where known) include:
Daughters of Democracy (DoD 23) Doers of Donuts Dancers of Despair (DoD 9) Debasers of Daughters Dickweeds of Denver Driveway of Death Debauchers of Donuts Dumpers of Dirtbikes (For a comprehensive list consult DoD #709.)
Patches? What patches?
You may have heard mention of various DoD trinkets such as patches & pins. And your reaction was probably: "I want!", or "That's sick!", or perhaps "That's sick! I want!"
Well, there's some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there's been an amazing variety of DoD-labeled widgets created. The bad news is that there isn't anywhere you can buy any of them. This isn't because of any "exclusivity" attempt, but simply because there is no "DoD store" that stocks an inventory. All of the creations have been done by individual Denizens out of their own pockets. The typical procedure is someone says "I'm thinking of having a DoD frammitz made, they'll cost $xx.xx, with $xx.xx going to the AMA museum. Anyone want one?" Then orders are taken, and a batch of frammitzes large enough to cover the pre-paid orders is produced (and quickly consumed). So if you want a DoD doodad, act quickly the next time somebody decides to do one. Or produce one yourself if you see a void that needs filling, after all this is anarchy in action. If you feel the urge to create a DoDad, the Postscript image of Geeky The Daemon is on cerritos.edu as DEMON1.PS.
Here's a possibly incomplete list of known DoD merchandise (and perpetrators). Patches (DoD 11), pins (DoD 99), stickers (DoD 99), motorcycle license plate frames (DoD 216), t-shirts (DoD 99), polo shirts (DoD 122), Zippo lighters (DoD 99) [LtF FtL], belt buckles (DoD 99), and patches (DoD 99) [a second batch was done (and rapidly consumed) by popular demand].
All "profits" have been donated to the American Motorcyclist Association Motorcycle Heritage Museum. As of June 1992, over $5500 dollars has been contributed to the museum fund by the DoD. If you visit the museum, you'll see a large plaque on the Founders' Wall in the name of "Denizens of Doom, USENET, The World", complete with a DoD pin.
Here's a letter from the AMA to the DoD regarding our contributions.~Newsgroups: rec.motorcycles
I received the following letter from Jim Rogers, director of the Museum, the other day.
"Dear Arnie and all members of the Denizens of Doom:
Congratulations and expressions of gratitude are in order for you and the Denizens of Doom! With your recent donation, the total amount donated is now $5,500. On behalf of the AMHF, please extend my heartfeld gratitude to all the membership of the Denizens. The club's new plaque is presently being prepared. Of course, everyone is invited to come to the museum to see the plaque that will be installed in our Founders Foyer. By the way, I will personally mount a Denizens club pin on the plaque. Again, thank you for all your support, which means so much to the foundation, the museum, and the fulfillment of its goals.
Sincerely, Jim Rogers, D.O.D. #0395 Director P.S. Please post on your computer bulletin board." As you all know, even though the letter was addressed to me personally, it was meant for all of you who purchased DoD goodies that made this amount possible. Arnie
The rec.moto.photo archive
First a bit of history, this all started with Ilana Stern and Chuck Rogers organizing a rec.motorcycles photo album. Many copies were made, and several sets were sent on tours around the world, only to vanish in unknown locations. Then Bruce Tanner decided that it would be appropriate for an electronic motorcycle gang to have an electronic photo album. Bruce has not only provided the disk space and ftp & e-mail access, but he has taken the time to scan most of the photos that are available from the archive.
Not only can you see what all these folks look like, you can also gawk at their motorcycles. A few non-photo files are available from the server too, they include the DoD membership list, the DoD Yellow Pages, the general rec.motorcycles FAQ, and this FAQ posting.
Here are a couple of excerpts from messages Bruce posted about how to use the archive.
********************************************************** Via ftp: cerritos.edu [184.108.40.206] Via e-mail: The address is email@example.com. The commands are given in the body of the message. The current commands are DIR and SEND, given one per line. The arguments to the commands are VMS style file specifications.For rec.moto.photo the file spec is [DOD]file. For example, you can send: dir [dod] send [dod]bruce_tanner.gif send [dod]dodframe.ps and you'll get back 5 mail messages; a directory listing, 3 uuencoded parts of bruce_tanner.gif, and the dodframe.ps file in ASCII. Oh, wildcards (*) are allowed, but a maximum of 20 mail messages (rounded up to the next whole file) are sent. A 'send [dod]*.gif' would send 150 files of 50K each; not a good idea. -- Bruce Tanner (213) 860-2451 x 596 Tanner@Cerritos.EDU Cerritos College Norwalk, CA cerritos!tanner **********************************************************
A couple of comments: Bruce has put quite a bit of effort into this, so why not drop him a note if you find the rec.moto.photo archive useful? Second, since Bruce has provided the server as a favor, it would be kind of you to access it after normal working hours (California time).
Other rec.motorcycles information resources.
There are several general rec.motorcycles resources that may or may not have anything to do with the DoD. Most are posted on a regular basis, but they can also be obtained from the cerritos ftp/e-mail server (see the info on the photo archive above).
A general rec.motorcycles FAQ is maintained by Dave Williams. Cerritos filenames are FAQn.TXT, where n is currently 1-6.
The DoD Yellow Pages, a listing of motorcycle industry vendor phone numbers & addresses, is maintained by bob pakser. Cerritos filename is YELLOW_PAGES_Vnn, where n is the rev. number.
The List of the DoD membership is maintained by The Keeper of the List. Cerritos filename is DOD.LIST.
This WitDoD FAQ (surprise, surprise!) is maintained by yours truly. Cerritos filename is DOD_FAQ_Vnn.TXT, where n is the rev. number.
Additions, corrections, etc. for any of the above should be aimed at the keepers of the respective texts.
(LoKi Jorgenson firstname.lastname@example.org) has provided an archive site for motorcycle and accessory reviews, here's an excerpt from his periodic announcement.
********************************************************** Monthly R.M.R. Archive Update for August, 1993 (WE'RE BACK AND BIGGER THAN EVER!!)::::::: Archivist's note: OK. So I've been a bit absent lately.
The Rec.Motorcycles.Reviews Archives (and World Famous Llama Emporium) contains a Veritable Plethora (tm) of bike (and accessories) reviews, written by rec.moto readers based on their own experiences. These invaluable gems of opinion (highly valued for their potential to reduce noise on the list) can be accessed via anonymous FTP, Email server (except for images) or by personal request. A number of motorcycle images are also available on a more casual basis (access is limited to between 20h00 and 08h00 on weekdays and all day weekends; other times are possible on an individual basis).Anonymous FTP: ftp.cecm.sfu.ca (220.127.116.11)
To get started with the Email server, send a message with a line containing only "send help". We have a slightly stupid mailer; mail service will be improved in the near future.
If you are interested in submitting a review of a bike that you already own(ed), PLEASE DO! There is a template of the format that the reviews are kept in (more or less) included after the current review index. For those who have Internet access but are unsure of how anonymous FTP works, an example script is available on request.
Reviews of any motorcycle related accessory or widget are welcome too.
John Stafford has been kind enough to provide another ftp site for rec.motorcyles denizens. You're likely to find some stuff here that isn't on Cerritos or McGill. Here's the info from John:Newsgroups: rec.motorcycles
RE: The server
There are megabytes of motorcycle pictures, faces of some Usenet riders, text, etc on the following FTP server:Server: 18.104.22.168 (Vax1.Winona.MSUS.edu)
NOTE do not use 'cd ..' Use CDUP (cdup) instead.
PUT any material where you feel it is appropriate or into 'incoming' if you are undecided.
Remember, files ending in .GIF or .JPG or .MPG are _binary_ files. You must transfer them in binary mode. Also, please upload any text files in text mode.
-------------------------------------------------- John Stafford Minnesota State University @ Winona All standard disclaimers apply.
Updated stats & rec.motorcycles rides info
Some of the info cited above in various places tends to be a moving target. Rather than trying to catch every occurence, I'm just sticking the latest info down here.
Estimated readership stats for for rec.motorcycles groups:
rec.motorcycles ? rec.motorcycles.racing ? rec.motorcycles.harley ? rec.motorcycles.dirt ? [news.lists] Approximate DoD Membership: 2,300+ You may obtain a current listing of DoD numbers by fingering "email@example.com", or by sending e-mail to the same address. (E-Mail content is not important, as it will never be read by a human anyway). DoD contributions to the American Motorcyclist Association Motorcycle Heritage Museum. Over $7145! [Charlie Smith]
How do I get a DoD number?
If the most Frequently Asked Question in rec.motorcycles is "What is the DoD?", then the second most Frequently Asked Question must be "How do I get a DoD number?" That is as simple as asking the Keeper of the List (KotL, accept no substitute Keepers) for a number. If you're feeling creative, and your favorite number hasn't been taken already, you can make a request, subject to KotL approval. (Warning, non-numeric, non- base-10 number requests are likely to earn a flame from the KotL. Not that you won't get it, but you _will_ pay for it.)
Oh, and just one little, tiny suggestion. Ask the KotL in e-mail. You'll just be playing the lightning rod for flames if you post to the whole net, and you'll look like a clueless newbie too.
By now you're probably asking "So who's the KotL already?". Well, as John Sloan notes below, that's about the only real "secret" left around here, but a few (un)subtle hints can be divulged.
o The KotL's mailer of choice shares its name with the common name of the tree which is genus Ulmus, family Ulmaceae. o The KotL shares a first name with a cartoon fish which was once popular in TV commercials, and a last name with a famous motorcyclist who went on to sell motorcycle accessories. o The KotL is as of this writing, an unemployed biker scum. o Judging from his posts and e-mail, the KotL seems to have a good grip on the time. o The KotL's DoD number can be derived from the following formula: X = D + Y*R - B*S Where: X = The KotL's DoD number. D = The sum of the model numbers of the KotL's 2 Ducks. Y = The number of spark plugs in the KotWitDoDFAQ's bike. R = The number of tires on a Spagthorpe Rotwieler. B = The model number of the KotL's newest BMW. S = The number of letters in the name of the KotL's state of residence. (Note: where a model number has letters as well as numbers, just ignore the letters.) o Here is a uuencoded .gif. It is part of a picture of the KotL. You can check the rec.moto.photo archive for the full, original picture. There is one other picture of the KotL, and from that one you can identify the KotL. Both pictures feature the KotL and the same bike. Note: The KotL thinks that prospective DoD members should be able to explain why they believe they have correctly identified the KotL, email messages just saying 'gimme a number' will likely get ignored! Or soundly flamed! Perhaps you should be asking who *isn't* the KotL? Well, lots of people, actually. However, John Sloan, Ed Green and Lisa DeLorme aren't. Any more. The new Kotl is... Someone else.
How to amuse, placate, and generally bribe the KotL:
The new KotL has told me that requests must show creativity and imagimation. Here's an example that showed up in the KotL's mailbox, taking this to the extremes:
>Mighty KotL, please hear my words: > > To the new KotL I give praise; > Now that you're here, O'happy days! > I come to make a request, > To be fulfilled at your behest, > This appeal that I now raise: > > I am a writer of code, > Who rides the open road. > To Geeky's realm I aspire, > A DoD number I require, > So I may flame from my cathode! > > >I make tributes to your coffers; with the following verse I bring as offers: > > Wreck.moto fulfills my needs, > Joys of computers and steel steeds. > Talking bikes on the net, > How much better can it get? > Forever debating the best of the breeds. > > Geeky rules in the land of Doom, > Dwellers there gather in eternal gloom. > They ride by day, post by night, > Flaming away with great delight. > Inhabitants in a state of perpetual fume. > > The Denizens' world is full of fire, > Attacking squidly threads they never tire. > Each post is fair game, > Putting squids to their shame, > No one is ever safe from their ire! > >I hope that these words of wit; will help in my favor, just a little bit? > >Your humble applicant, > > firstname.lastname@example.org (Jeffry A. Arend) You obviously don't have to go this far ... but, as the KotL is easily amused, you ought to try to spice it up a bit.
One more thing, the KotL's telepathic powers aren't what they used to be. So provide some information for the list, will ya? The typical DoD List entry contains number, name, state/country, & e-mail address. For example:
0000:Wyle E. Coyote:AZ:wyle@Acme.Manufacturing.Com
(PS: While John mentioned above that net access and a bike are the only requirements for DoD membership, that's not strictly true these days, as there are a number of Denizens who lack one or both.)
-Jon- .-------------------------------------------------------------------------. | Jon Steiger == DoD# 1038 == USUA# A46209 == NMA# 117376 == KotWitDoDFAQ | | email@example.com && http://www.cs.fredonia.edu/~stei0302/ | | '96 Dakota SLT V-8, '91 FZR600R /* Just another mangy hacker */ | `-------------------------------------------------------------------------'